Oh, where to begin?

First, my tone is different from when I usually write in my journal. Tonight, my tone is not pointed to God, but to myself and whoever may read this later. I believe that someone, one day, will read this, even if that person is a future version of me. I have some reason- though I can’t put a name to it- to believe that my words are valuable to someone other than myself.  Maybe I’m referring to God afterall, or you. A mystery isn’t it, not knowing what I mean? Are you confused? I wish I could entrance my readers. I wish I could make a wed with my words to entangle them.

The second thing you should know is that I have jumped on the Twilight band wagon. I was cautious at first and my stubborn self refused to do what every one else was making popular, so I saw the movies. I am a very visual person. I like to see people’s expressions and every other detail the Creator has a hand in, quite literally. Well I have heard so much talk about how the books are better and that I would hate the movies after reading them. Being the curious me, I bought the book a few days ago.

Now, rewind to the last few weeks when I have been listening to the book Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge (read this book if you are brave enough to look into the woman’s soul; I challenge men not to be too cowardice to search). In chapter 3, or 4 maybe, the couple talk about why women feel inadequate and depressed more easily than men and why the whole universe seems to be against the woman. Afterall, it was my kind that ate from the tree God warned Adam and Eve not to eat from.

From the beginning, or quite near to the beginning of time, woman was convinced by Satan to disobey God. She was convinced that God was holding out on her. Hold on, man was right beside her; he is not off the hook, in fact, he has just stepped up to the witness stand! Why didn’t he protect her? Why did he remain silent, simply to watch her fall? Because of his statue-like  qualities, woman has a reason to blame herself for being too weak. Since man gave in, woman is weak. Ironic, isn’t it?

Roll back the sundial, to when there was no established time (I hope your head isn’t spinning yet from the time traveling).  Satan was known in heaven for his glorious beauty and he became proud. In return, his place in heaven was taken from him in the light and he was deemed prince of darkness. His very name, Lucifer, meant light. His fury must have raged as his position and his very being was stripped from him.

This time fast forward to before the Fall. Genesis 2:18 says that after God made Adam he said, “It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” So, God made animals- that explains why dog is man’s best friend. That day, everything God made was not good, the helper for Adam remained uncreated. “So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made woman out of the man and he brought her to the man.” Genesis 2:21-22.

No wonder women feel the need for a man in their lives! Women were made specially for men. With that in rib, we ache to know the one we came from (“two will become as one”). Knowing what I know, there’s no more mystery why women hurt so deeply when we see some disappointment in a man or the disappointment he holds for us in his eyes. That’s why it is painful when a woman sees or even thinks that she is not enough for man. We are programmed knowing that women should be enough for men. When God created women, he had man in mind; man was the purpose.

Fast forward to the scene right before the Fall (how’s the motion sickness?). Now, do you understand why the universe, more specified Satan, is constantly attacking women? He knows that if he can get a woman to believe she is not doing her created purpose right, then he can, woman by woman, dim the light and beauty from the world.  When Gos created woman, he made her the very reference point of beauty. Everyday Satan seeks vengeance upon the one who was bestowed with what was originally his.

Bringing us back to the present, where I have read through the first of the Twilight saga in merely four days. I use to enjoy reading books very quickly like this one. I have never felt more alive; I should explain. When I read books, I like to think of a lot of things beyond and before the book. I am forever curious about the writer, the creator, behind the work. I won’t bring in my theories about Stephenie Meyer; they went through my head far too quickly to remember the important ones. But reading books makes me think more and always with a new perspective on life, and that makes me want to write.

Throughout the book, I wrote down words that I thought I knew what they meant, but was intrigued by what a dictionary would say about them. This word stuck in my head: Forever.

Forever: continually; persistently. Constantly, continuously, always, all the time.

-alaynagrace

Based out of San Diego, California, Invisible Children is a non-profit organization that works with and raises awareness for the people of war-torn Northern Uganda. The founders of IC are Jason Russell, Bobby Bailey, and Laren Poole. Jolly Okot, IC’s Education Program Director, brought the filmmakers to Northern Uganda in 2003. Okot had a dream for the Acholi people, her own people, that they would be given a chance to education and peace of mind. She knew that after seeing the effects on the children from the 23-year war, the boys could not ignore the Acholi.

During their film-making adventure in Africa, the three Americans discovered that they were in the midst of a story needing to be told. With three tickets, $300, and the support from their families and friends, the boys set out on their hunt for the truth. While in Northern Uganda, Russell, Bailey, and Poole learned that children were being taken from their homes and forced to fight as child soldiers. The boys met up with Jolly Okot, a pregnant woman who had picked them up and took them to her house. On their way to her house, the group experienced the reality of the Joseph Kony’s Lord’s Resistance Army. The village was overwhelmed with people who were trying to escape the LRA’s attacks. Every night in Northern Uganda hundreds of children commute to the middle of their cities to seek some protection from the violent, child abducting army.  

In the 1800s, Northern and Southern Uganda were separated into two classes and the Northerners were forced to be laborers and soldiers. The North started to rebel against the Government of Uganda and their forced situation when Alice Lakwena, who claimed to have been given a mission by the Holy Spirit, began the Holy Spirit Movement. After Lakwena was exiled because of the rebellion she led, Joseph Kony began the Lord’s Resistance Army, but his rebellion against the GoU was not as well supported as Lakwena’s movement. This is when Kony decided to start abducting children during the night and threatening them to be child soldiers.

Kony is said to be like the messiah or Jesus Christ and claims to be able to do miracles. His eyes burn red and he is feared by all. This man has abducted thousands of children, forcing them to be soldiers, and threatening them with death if they resist. The International Criminal Court first began in 2002, and Joseph Kony is the first wanted man by the ICC.

After much U.S. involvement, April 2008, marked the time when a peace agreement would finally be presented to Kony. IC founders were asked to video the history making moment of Kony signing the agreement. Deep inside the Garamba Forest waited 200 people for the defining moment of the Ugandan people. During this time IC founders were able to learn more about the child soldiers on a firsthand basis and give them faces through pictures and videos. Five days of waiting, negotiating, and fear led to Kony rejecting the peace agreement. Kony’s power only seemed to grow after the peace agreement failed.

On Christmas day of 2008, Kony massacred 620 people and 160 children were abducted. The fury of the LRA grew beyond the Acholi people; they started targeting people in the Congo, Sudan, and Central Africa. The rebels began mutilating people who resisted by cutting off their lips and noses.

The film featured a previous child soldier named Jacob. Jacob and his brother were taken by the LRA when he was very young; his brother tried to resist but was killed in front of Jacob by means of machetes. Jacob said he tried to cry but was told that if he did he would also be killed and if he tried to run away he would be killed. By age 14, Jacob was able to escape “the bush” and told the IC his story. Before the founders left Jacob, he broke down in tears telling them that he would rather die than be on earth right now. He asked the founders to help him because nobody is looking out for the child soldiers.

Through the IC programs, many children just like Jacob are given a chance to receive an education and they are given hope to survive. But many are still lost in the bush, without a name. The children simply vanish from the face of the planet when taken; there are no records kept for the thousands of child soldiers brought into the LRA. As the war continues, children are taken from their homes every night and made to carry guns and destroy their own people.

It’s easy to get wrapped up in school, finances, and whatever “tragedies” invade Americans’ lives. The IC opens doors for people to care about others halfway around the world. The world is hurting and thousands of real people, including 9 year old children, are oppressed and dying by the minute. What will you do?

Get Involved…

Global Night Commute: On April 29^th, Global Night Commute is an IC project where Americans gather in over 130 cities across the country to lie down and join the IC’s team in raising awareness for the children in Northern Uganda. Every city has designated a location within the city for people to lie down to raise awareness for the government to open its eyes to “night commuting,” mass child abduction, and the war in Northern Uganda.   

Join TRI to Rescue Child Soldiers: The TRI campaign allows people to donate $3 a week in order to rescue 3,000 child soldiers. TRI needs at least 3,000 individuals to pledge $12 a month to help the children.

Give a Child Scholarship: Giving a child a scholarship is another way to be involved with the invisible children. The scholarship program provides 690 children with an education which costs sponsors only $25 a month to cover the child’s entire monthly school fees.

Sponsor a Mentor: The children in the scholarship program need mentors. Mentors provide the children with scholastic and emotional support. $10 a month will help a mentor work with a child and help the child succeed.

Sponsor a Bracelet or Handbag Maker: IC helps the Northern Uganda people by working with them through a microeconomic program of making bracelets and handbags. Donating $25 a month can help provide a bracelet or handbag maker with a weekly wage.

Rebuild a School: Schools for Schools is a project where schools around the world have raised money to help support the schools that have been torn by the war. Committing $15 a month to this campaign helps keep the work going in Uganda by supporting Ugandan engineers and staff.

Spread the Word: The main way everyone can make a difference in Uganda is through spreading the word about the children who disappear into the harsh realities of war by being taken from their families and friends and being forced to become child soldiers.

Other Videos:

While I sit here in the white farmhouse I grew up in, watching the Hannah Montana movie, I decided to blog about my Christmas thoughts.

I love the smell of winter, especially in this old house. I’m not happy about the winter cold though. I keep thinking that it shouldn’t already be this cold, then my calendar tells me it’s October and I have less than two months until Christmas break and the end of Sophomore semester one. I am ready to be out of school now! I’m tired of doing school work and reading all the time. Right now I would much rather have a full-time job that I can leave at the workplace- school is constantly haunting me.

This year, my brother and I are ahead of the game on Christmas shopping. We got the two hardest people out of the way- the parents. Now I’m thinking the boyfriend will be the next hardest. By Christmas we will have been dating one year and eleven months. I still am unsure of what I, as a girlfriend, should do.

I think a person’s Christmas wish list tells a lot about that person’s current life. Take mine: GPS, money, a pearl, and gift cards. I want a GPS because I want to travel to new places but I am very challenged in the area of knowing where I am and where I need to be. Directionally challenged; that’s the saying. Who doesn’t want or need money? I want money because you can spend it anywhere, but more importantly I can put it into my bank account for when I need it most. A pearl is my “awe” gift. It’s the gift that means something to me. This would signify the way I hope my life to go from the point I’m at now. A pearl is created through irritation. I feel like irritation plays a big part in my life and has for awhile. What I hope to become is something beautiful. I don’t expect perfection, but the pearl is a hope of what I want to become- something precious and beautifully crafted. Gift cards set apart money that I have to use at certain stores. It makes me go buy things and not feel guilty because I could have used the money elsewhere.

Okay, Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus moment. She’s singing Climb. I think Mom’s crying, or having sinus problems.

I think we all have had a point in our lives when we’ve portrayed ourselves as someone different from who we are. Or is it just me? My best friend Jordan and I were talking about this today. It’s hard to find someone who always reveals the real them. We live in a world full of a lot of fakes. I think girls especially have this problem. We want people in each circle of friends to perceive us in a specific way. We want to be seen as nice, giving, bold, strong in our beliefs, sympathetic, and, of course, attractive. I don’t think I will ever understand why girls want to please people so much. It’s ridiculous how many masks we have to change out of in one day. I know for myself, I am unsure of who the real me is. On this note, I will end with the song Reflections
by Christina Aquilera.

Glory to One -alaynagrace

God is good. I just forget He holds my hand.

I believe I am the most inconsistent blogger. But not just with blogging- in life. My walk with God isn’t the way it should always be either.

I’m really excited about a gospel concert I went to on Sunday, which I also wrote an article on for TNJN. With help from my TNJN editor, my article made the top of the homepage. I’m not really sure what that means, but it makes me super excited!

Today, Justin’s mom sent me a quick text reminding me about her friend opening a Hallmark store in Opry Mills needing christmas help. I could definitely use the money.

Thanks to all readers for being interested.

Glory to One – alaynagrace

Sophomore year is here! Well, sophomore year has been here for about a month now, but I’ve just been really busy. I am very excited about all of my classes. It’s amazing what happens when I’m actually interested in what I am studying about. My classes are as follows: Sociology (General Sociology), Religious Studies (Intro to Judaism, Christianity, Islam), Political Science (Intro to Political Science), Journalism and Electronic Media (Intro to JEM), and Musicology (Jazz in American Culture).

This year is definitely different. This year, I know where to eat, where Walmart and the mall is, and what the building codes are.

Something very recent is a JEM 275 class assignment. The choices given were working at the school newspaper, TV station, radio station, journalism website, or  writing a 10 page paper. Of course, I chose to work on the journalism website.

Yesterday I met with another Tennessee Journalist reporter from the Arts and Cultures section. Erica met me outside UT’s International House at 6:00 pm to cover a story about Greek week. Oh! I forgot to mention that I got a new and very cool camera so that I could be a photographer (though I’m not really good yet). We learned a lot had had tons of fun. Erica is so sweet and a great writer!

Last night I stayed up until 1:30 am to edit photos, captions, write a summary and to put some finishing touches on the article. I learned that it’s something I really enjoy if I stay up that late. After setting the article to “Ready for Editing,” Erica sent our editor an email telling him that it was ready. This morning when I woke up the article was on the front page of the Arts and Cultures section. Just a few hours later our article moved to the homepage of TNJN!

That’s all for now. I have to go study for two tests tomorrow.

Glory to One- alayna grace

When we behold the disfigurement of the Son of God, when we find ourselves appalled by his marred appearance, we need to reckon afresh that it is upon ourselves we gaze, for he stood in our place.

-John Calvin

Who killed Jesus?

God did. God the Father was ultimately responsible for the death of His Son. God is telling us, “I purposefully determined to crush My Son with My wrath- for your sins, as your substitute.”

Why?

“Because I love you.”

-C. J. Mahaney

When we think of Christ’s dying on the cross we are shown the lengths to which God’s love goes in order to win us back to Himself. We would almost think that God loved us more than He loves His son. We cannot measure His love by any other standard. He is saying to us, “I love you this much.”

The cross is the heart of the gospel good news. Christ died for us; He has stood in our place before God’s judgement seat; He has borne our sins. God has done something on the cross which we could never do for ourselves. But God does something to us as well as for us through the cross. He persuades us that He loves us.

-Sinclair Ferguson

For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.

1 Corinthians 2:2

Lest I forget Gethsemane, Lest I forget Thine agony; Lest I forget Thy love for me, Lead me to Calvary       -Jennie Evelyn Hussey

At the third hour, 9:00 am, on the morning of what would later become Good Friday, my Savior was sentenced to death on a cross. Crucifixion, the most painful and agonizing death sentenced by the Roman Empire. With no wrongs found, he is given the penalty by the mob of the same people who had just a few days earlier loved and worshipped him. In the presence of Pilate, he knew why he was placed on this earth. “You are a king then!” said Pilate. Jesus answered, “You are right in saying I am a king. In fact, for this reason I was born, and for this I came into the world, to testify to the truth. Everyone on the side of truth listens to me.” -John 18:37 He does not deserve the treatment yet he take it from and for his people. The sacrifice must be made.

 Adorned with a crown of thorns and a scarlet robe that burned his skin, my King was beaten beyond recognition. Muscles weak and stretched; skin opened, wounds exposed; barely able to stand, he is beaten one strike away from death. Enough punishment so that he can still live to endure the pain to its fullest. The only place on his body that was not blood stained left the marks of tears as they rolled from his swollen eyes. He cries not from the pain, but because of the betrayal of his people. “For if men do these things when the tree is green, what will happen when it is dry?” Luke 23:31 The friends have turned against their true and righteous King. His flesh is ripped. He was mocked, bruised and treated as a criminal. Weakened from the beatings and abuse of the soldiers, he can hardly stand but is made to carry the cross- his death.  The murdered was placed in between two murderers. The glory God had placed on him was no longer seen. Though he remains the Son, he was disowned by the Father. By noon my sins were taken and laid on the High King. By noon that day all my wrongs were covered for and I owed nothing to compensate for my mistakes. By noon the land surrounding the Golgotha, which means the place of the skull, was dark. God had turned away from the world’s only once perfect being, but now the most imperfect man. Once pure, now damned with every sin I have ever committed and have yet to commit.

At 3:00 pm, a voice cries out, “Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani.” The One who covers my wrongs cries out to his Father, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” On Golgotha, Jesus breathed his last breath. Even as his lungs emptied, he was recognized by a soldier as a man that could only be the Son of God. When Jesus died, the earth shook; rocks split. The tombs of righteous people were opened and the dead were allowed to breath and live once again on the earth. As the last heart beat drummed its weary song, the temple’s curtain tore from top to bottom. The veil that once hid Christ’s followers from the Most Holy Place was stripped. Through his death we were no longer separated from God’s presence. Our eternal longing is satisfied.

The night before his crucifixion he went to an olive garden (Gethsemane) to talk to the Father. He felt the stress of knowing what he was going to endure the next day. As anxiety flowed through his body, mind and spirit, he sweat drops of blood. The King knew what his purpose on earth was. He died willingly. He knew the seriousness of the mission set before him by God. In the olive garden Jesus asked his Father to relieve him, but only if it was the Father’s will.

This Good Friday is my Good Friday. Without the King’s sacrifice, I have no hope. Without his death I am subject to the punishment he endured.

Remember the meaning of “Good Friday”.

You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.                            -Romans 5:6-8

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. -John 3:16-17

I was created with the idea of eternity already in my heart. God has prepared a place for me. I am anxiously waiting to be romanced. He is my king; The King. What is it like to marry the King? What is it like for you, my King, to be my husband? I want you to be mine. I want to be yours and only yours. Will you have me? As I ask this question, I know that I don’t even have to ask. You have already asked for not only my hand in marriage, but my whole being. Everything I am, good and bad, you desire to claim as your own. You knew me before my time on earth. You know me deeper than anyone. Yet, you still wish to be my groom. You have already made wedding plans and reservations for the places you wish to take me to. Every detail you have planned out.

Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready. Fine linen, bright and clean, was given her to wear.  -Revelation 19:7-8

He is dressed in a robe dipped in blood, and his name is the Word of God. -Revelation 19: 13

To die would be a great adventure. To live would be an even greater adventure. -Robin Williams in the movie Hook

To say we all face a decision when we’re pierced by an Arrow is misleading. It makes the process sound so rational, as though we have the option of coolly assessing the situation and choosing a logical response. Life isn’t like that-the heart cannot be managed in a detached sort of way (certainly not when we are young, when some of the most defining Arrows strike). It feels more like an ambush and our response is at gut level. We may never put words to it. Our deepest convictions are formed without conscious effort, but the effect is a shift deep in our soul. Commitments form never to be in that position again, never to know that sort of pain again. The result is an approach to life that we often call our personality. If you’ll listen carefully to your life, you may begin to see how it has been shaped by the unique Arrows you’ve known and the particular convictions you’ve embraced as a result. The Arrows also taint and partially direct even our spiritual life. -The Sacred Romance